n primary school our teachers really used to make a song through the proverb “Birds of the same feathers flock together,” and as pupils we took it for granted because at the time we felt like we were just being teased for the type of friends that we had.
In primary school our teachers really used to make a song through the proverb “Birds of the same feathers flock together,” and as pupils we took it for granted because at the time we felt like we were just being teased for the type of friends that we had. Decades later as young adults you look back and realize that it is true that the people you choose or choose not to keep around you will actually give you a glimpse into the quality of life you will lead as an individual. Famous sociologist Emile Durkheim believed that society exerted a powerful force on individuals which was basically due to people’s norms, beliefs and values which made up a collective consciousness creating social integration, in simple English we need each other for society to prosper.
The new modern world has greatly neglected the power of social cohesion; this is driven by so many factors such as collapse of family based community living, in the case of most African countries more so here in Uganda family ,the clan is ought to be the first unit of socio-economic organization in any community therefore all children upbringing , socialization into family, cultural norms and language was a community initiative enabling future generations to navigate through life with a comfort of strong social ties ,however with the rise of urbanization the family has become more separated and nuclear thus forging secluded worldviews among new generations . Additionally, the adverse effects of Covid 19 pandemic have left individuals in society with solitary and individualistic attitudes due to the lengthy period of isolation during the lockdown. Now don’t quote me wrong there is no offence in wanting personal space, personal growth and development it is actually very important however the problem comes when this is done in excess because at the end of the day as human beings we are social animals, we are wired to seek connectivity and anything short of that would diminish our species because even procreation stems through sexual connection. At the same time the quality of those connections is imperative, the world we live in today is already hard enough with all kinds of injustices, political, gender wars, unemployment etc. so one of the ways to soften that blow is for us to surround ourselves with people that are forging positive impacts in our lives. Psychologists have coined up a term referred to as “psychological cues” which is any stimuli, whether internal or external that can influence a person’s behavior, thoughts or emotions. These cues can be verbal or non-verbal, positive or negative, through this definition it is vital to appreciate that as human beings we pick cues, energy or “aura” more than anything else especially negative cues because they are very contagious therefore if you surround yourself with people that constantly express negative cues such as frequent anxiety, low confidence it will subconsciously reflect on you ultimately making you a low performing individual and same applies vice versa.
In closing this discussion, I believe that it is very fundamental to apply the concept of strategic selfishness, we need to place ourselves in friendships, communities that correlate with the needs, values and ambitions we have placed for ourselves while here on earth. Life is a series of rooms and who we get stuck in those rooms adds up to what our lives are.
